anotherlook

Picture Courtesy of CNN Justice

Empathy is defined as the ability to identify with and understand somebody else’s feelings or difficulties. The lack of empathy is exactly what was displayed earlier last week-end, at Richmond High School, as a 15-year-old girl was brutally gang-raped outside a California high school homecoming dance.

Richmond High was the scene to one of the worse displays of total lack of empathy imaginable, as not only was this 15-year-old girl gang-raped but she was beaten unconscious while at least ten people took turns raping her and ten others watched and offered no help, but instead video taped the cruelty on their cell phones to show others.

Now this comes on the heels of the senseless beating death of Derrion Albert, who was beaten to death in a “mob-mentality” free for all, in broad daylight on the streets of Chicago with grown-ups driving by and doing nothing to break up the madness.

Even as people are showing righteous indignation over both of these tragedies, you have to ask yourself, what part does society at large play in the lack of empathy shown in both of these cases as well as many more cases of violence kids today are participating in. It is all too easy to place the blame on the parents but truth is parents are not the only culprits in the raising of children in today’s world.

You have rappers, rapping about the street violence giving verbal praise to the madness, rapping in a manner that puts females on a level that encourages disrespect and the iPods as the means to blast this nonsense in the ears and consciousness of the kids, on a continuous basis, indoctrinating them into the world of violence that you see being displayed more and more often.

You have video games that take you to higher scores by beating down and killing computer generated people on the imaginary streets. You have police officers beating people down in the real streets as onlookers are denied the right to jump in and stop the madness for fear of getting beat down and arrested as well.

You have the highest court in the land, the Supreme Court, talking as though empathy on the bench, therefore empathy in the world, is something that is not tolerated in decision making. You have Social Services and legislation telling you how to discipline your children not truly understanding that some kids you can talk to, some kids you can punish by taking toys and television away, you have some kids that only understand when you yell at them and still others who straight need their behinds whipped at an early age because each of us is different.

Then there are those kids who just do not get it until they experience it for themselves. Sometimes that experience teaches them and sometimes that experience makes it worse because it is too late after the experience happens.

Despite the fact that I am horror-struck by what I see kids taking part in today this lends credence to my statements that what society perpetrates it perpetuates and until you recognize your shortcomings and change your ways how can you expect anything differently from those you attempt to raise into thinking, feeling adults.

Yes, you can punish these kids by trying them as adults but the truth is that prison does not deter crime – isn’t that obvious at this juncture? Shut those kids away for life without getting to the core of what lead to the behavior and what purpose does it serve society at large?

While those you lock away may not be able to commit a crime on the streets again there still remains the attitude and the influences that allowed this criminal behavior to flourish and there will be others that follow this path of chaos and violence.

And that’s the way I see it!!!!

Supernova Sequence 2 CLIMAWARM

I watched Latino In America, hosted by Soledad O’Brien, a level headed, mixed race, beautiful young lady, the other night on CNN and for some reason it saddened me. Latinos have been in this country for a while now and while I rooted for Sonya Sotomayor as she breezed through her confirmation hearings, as I watched this programming I realized the depth of my ambivalence about being born in America and my ambivalence comes from not truly having a “heritage” that all other races have. I also recognized that America is not conducive to “family” the way other nations are.

While some blacks may try to claim Africa as their heritage, I have never lived in Africa, I do not speak the language, cook the food or share their day to day struggles – my struggles are American struggles, soul food, which is the most detrimental to your health, was the leftovers from the tables of the “master” and the only culture that we, as a people have is that culture that we have made up or been passed on to us by those who hated us.

I watched as the discussion, on Latinos In America, took a turn towards assimilation and how as the children of these Latinos attempt to assimilate here in America, the family has a tendency to break-down with the parents pulling in the direction of their customs but the children wanting to become “true” Americans.

I also noted that, without calling any names, one Latino lead on CNN seems to get some perverse pleasure out of cleverly elevating Latinos at the expense of blacks, more often than I feel comfortable watching. Now I have sensed this aggression for some time but I was so glad Wednesday when a guest speaker pointed out to this Latino that there were black Latinos in America as well. People are so fickle sometimes as they cling to being accepted by people who may accept them anyway but may not accept them regardless.

Speaking from the experience of being black in America and the lack of respect for my forefathers and their families, I see the breakdown of immigrant families as a destructive nuance of American culture.

My Russian associate tells me how his, born in America six year old, makes comical comments about his accent. While we both laugh at the things she says, being in America is already straining the sense of “custom” within this family.

Even with this strain so obvious, there will be times that this child will grow up and possibly come back to her roots where I, being born in America over generations of mixing, have no true roots to return to, my features are not like those of Africans and on some levels as I watched Latinos in America, this thought broke my heart.

Not only did it break my heart but for the briefest of moments I felt resentment and the thought crossed my mind that America is in my debt. I quickly pulled that resentment back as well as the thought of the debt and grudgingly accepted that, it is what it is and the debt that is owed is too late for me to collect on but as for my children and my grandchildren, America needs to recognize just how ugly their actions were towards blacks and change their ways.

I guess my lack of heritage has always been a motivating factor that leads me to fantasize so much about living outside of the United States – at least then I could pretend easier of a connection with a heritage if I was away from the states. However, with the world as it is United States is probably the best place to be when you are as broke as me.

Latinos are the fastest growing nationality in the United States. I can not begrudge them for who they are and some of the food they have brought to my awareness I enjoy eating. The Latin beat in music is appealing to my ears and I understand that even though the “doors” are opened to many in America, American people are not as accepting on all levels as the diversity of people continues to branch out and so on some levels, the struggles of Latinos have been mines to bear as well.

My advice to Latinos is that you keep what is yours, your heritage, your culture and stay unified because as I have experienced being black in America over the years, with the games that were played on our forefathers and in our continued struggle for significance and to some degree acceptance, blacks are on no level unified and that is our biggest downfall. Hang in there Latinos and welcome aboard!!

And that’s the way I see it!!!!

The Global Advantage

Looking back, now that everybody was duped by the balloon boy story and the Heene family drama, all I can say is this shows how gullible we can all be at times – keep that in mind as the health care/insurance reform is going through the process and the lies are being told to dissuade.

I watched this for at least an hour and a half as it was unfolding. The balloon did not move as though it had a six year old in it but yet I watched with the thought of the possibility.

As I watched it gently float and spin across the sky on television, I was more amazed at the heights it soared as I imagined the danger if, in fact, a child was in there. However, as I watched the movement of this beautiful contraption, I knew there could not possibly be anyone in there.

Now that everything is out in the open and the truth has come to light that this was drama with a purpose, no more than a hoax, are we mad at ourselves that we were duped so easily that punishment is mandatory for the parents of these children.

Yes, the parents should be charged, yes, the parents should be made to pay the tab for the expenses incurred, probation for the felonies they will be charged with but involving Child Protective Services (CPS), threatening to take the kids away from their parents, jail time all seem a bit much to me.

Different people raise their children in different ways. What you may view as dangerous another parent may view as a learning experience. I am sure these parents are not putting their children in harms way without a clue, chasing storms. These children may enjoy riding with their parents chasing storms.

It is no different in fact it is less violent, than putting a gun in the hands of a seven year old and allowing them to kill a defenseless animal on a hunt. Those kids are saver in the hands of their parents than putting them in the system, in a foster home where they can easily be abused or murdered. CPS does not always have such a good track record themselves so how can they judge these people. I definitely would not want any of my relatives stuck in that system.

While some may say, me included, that it was over the line to have those kids taking part in a lie. When the six year old told the truth there were no repercussions for telling the truth. Don’t be so quick to criticize what you do not understand. Just because you would never take your kids out to chase a storm does not make it wrong. I would never put a gun into the hands of a seven year old but people do it all the time.

I would never allow my young children to curse in front of me, but people allow that. I would never allow one child to bully another child but people allow that. What you need to be doing is making sure you are raising your own children in the right way – nobody is perfect when it comes to raising children sometimes you learn as you go. Whether you have children or not how can you sit in judgment of this “family” and the lessons they chose to teach their children.

Drama, the Heene family is full of it. That’s who they are, that’s how they met, that’s what they are used to, that’s how they live their lives and it is their life to live. Those are their children and as parents they have rights to teach their children what they want to teach them. Get off your pedestal stop standing in judgment of someone else’s life and stop being so ready to send these kids through a system that is overloaded, uncaring and full of possible danger.

Reality television was not invented by the Heene family and as much as I dislike reality television it seems to be the thing at this particular time. As a result, these are the things you can expect, drama from people who want that attention.

You created the Heene’s and now you want to punish them for acting out. I just don’t understand the thought process of people. I remember when the Octomom was receiving death threats after she made a choice to have more babies. You would rather see her die than allow her to raise the children she chose to have – that was so irrational.

You yell about this freedom and that freedom for yourself but are constantly attempting to limit someone else’s freedoms every chance you get – how hypocritical.

And that’s the way I see it!!!!

24 MONSTER PULLBACK TRUCKS

Recently Morehouse College, an all-male college in the Atlanta, Georgia area, has instituted a new dress code for its students. According to the new dress code, things like sagging pants, clothes with derogatory language, do-rags, jeans, hats/caps or hoods and sunglasses are not to be worn to class or to school sponsored events and some of these articles are not to be worn on campus at all. The penalty can be as strong as academic suspension.

I say, it’s about time!!!! I say this style of dress should be prohibited in public schools as well (K-12). I say part of education is to teach children that there is a time and place for everything, that boundaries are important, in most situations. Once you start crossing boundaries, things sometimes become chaotic as has happened in schools across America.

Along with the dress code should be a restriction on foul language. Some high school teachers allow kids to curse in front of them with no consequence to the foul language. I have seen it happen too many times. Those children feel that if they can curse in school, they can come on the school bus and curse. Their whole conversation consists of f*** this, f*** that, you motherf***in’ b****.

When you write a child up for cursing on the school bus, after repeated warnings, nothing happens to that child and the child feels it is ok to use this language. The bus driver loses some control if they do not know how to force the issue without involving the school.

Teaching a child respect is a community thing because a parent is not always around. You teach a child to respect themselves as well as others and foul mouthed conversations do not show respect. Children today use dress as a form of disrespect. I have seen children on the way to school with pants sagging way below their behind. Is this a subtle message telling the world to kiss their a**?

While everybody runs around screaming about their freedom to say this or do that, I feel I have freedoms that you infringe upon by showing me your underwear, by cursing in my presence, by acting out with violence, by using the language Rush Limbaugh uses in his divisive rants, by demanding that I can not hang the Christmas decorations of my religious choice in my mall windows, as well as any number of other acts that are permitted in our society today.

In fact, back to Morehouse, they have prohibited the wearing of female clothing, high heel shoes, tank tops etc. and the few openly gay students there are taking offense. These are the things that trouble me about gay guys especially and to some extent gay women as well. Gay guys can not have it both ways either you are a boy or a girl. If you feel so womanly that you are compelled to dress in female clothing, then you do not need to be going to an all-male school.

Boundaries again come into play here. This is what concerns me about the “don’t ask, don’t tell” concept in the military. Will the breakdown of don’t ask, don’t tell create more openly gay men in the military? Will they be allowed to dress in female clothing on their down time while attempting to act out in womanly ways? Will your young son be caught in a life or death situation, laying in a ditch with an openly gay man who proposes a “blow job” to your son prior to possible death?

While all gay guys/females are not on this level there are those that are and I have known enough gay guys to understand that they are constantly on the prowl and that they have been known to pull in a “newbie” every now and then if only for the experience.

I say boundaries are useful in the real world. Dress codes teach lessons and it takes a community to raise a child – we are all failing our children when we abuse the freedoms that have been granted, sending a clear message to our children that rules are made to be broken, that boundaries interfere with freedoms.

And that’s the way I see it!!!!

Flexfit Baseball Hat - Solid Color with Contrast Stitching

I watched the video of the death of Derrion Albert yesterday on the news and was appalled at the shear violence, the mob mentality, the excitement of the participants and the lack of concern of the passersby’s driving through the milieu with obvious disinterest.

What the hell is this world coming to when a sixteen year old child can be beaten to death on the streets in broad daylight, with people passing by and not giving a f***. While the consensus seems to be that those who participated have no “home training,” that they are “unsalvageable” what is the excuse for those who passed by as though nothing was happening?

Have we become so afraid of the violence that we are desensitized to death on the streets? As the video tape is rolling, capturing the violence, who had a rational thought of attempting to stop the madness – nobody. As cars attempted to get through the mob of students acting out, who had the courage to stop their car and attempt to break up the fight – nobody.

This was a disturbing display of the selfish uncaring detachment people show in today’s world yet you sit in judgment of the participants of the violence, even the parents of those who participated, when in actuality you are no better, as adults, driving through the madness with one thought on your mind – let me get away from here before I am somehow touched by the madness not really understanding that in witnessing and not acting, you are touched by the madness.

Yes, Chicago is experiencing a rise in teen deaths, yes the violence is getting out of hand but we have been here before in different cities across America. Children are coming to school armed and deadly to avenge wrongs that have been perpetrated against them. Gang warfare is happening in the streets of major cities, violence and anger is on the rise in both teens and adults as demonstrated in the protests against health care/insurance reform.

Cops are being videotaped beating and kicking suspects, brothers, sisters, fathers, mothers, aunts, uncles and friends are being sent off to war only to come back in caskets. Turn on your television at any given time and the violence you see does not always come from Hollywood but are the depictions of real life violence; wars, protest, angry people, hate filled faces, panicked children running from schools where rampages of death are taking place.

Yet, it is so much easier to place the violence of children on the parents of the child, which may have a direct bearing on the situation, however, this violence goes much deeper than dysfunctional households – it goes to the dysfunctionality of the society we live in. As I have always said, society gets the level of violence it perpetrates on its citizens. You reap what you sow; what you put out there is returned to you tenfold.

As you drive past the violence on the streets rushing to get to your uptown housing, you need to be recognizing that the violence that you ignore will soon be in a neighborhood near you. You need to recognize the old saying that it takes a village to raise a child and dedicate yourself to being part of that village.

You need to take responsibility for your lack of compassion, your insensitivities, your need not to get involved, your uncaring, hard hearted attitudes, your own irrational, selfish, hate filled actions that allows for things like this to happen right in front of your faces – you need to CARE!!!!

But most of all, as selfishness has become the norm, you need to recognize that this could be your child, your grandchild, your niece or nephew because violence is indiscriminate, bullets claim lives of the innocent and irrational behaviors touch every life that witnesses the madness.

And that’s the way I see it!!!!!

Argyle Backpack

Since I have had my fill of politics, health care reform, war and I am on racism overload, I have decided to put my two cents in on Chris Brown and Rihanna.

As a victim of domestic violence and having watched the Larry King Show with Chris Brown as his guest, I got the impression Chris did not want to discuss the details of how this came about because, just maybe, he was not the one to throw the first punch.

This could be why he said he would rather Rihanna tell the story – he was leaving it up to her to come clean, in her own time and in her own way.

Regardless of who threw the first punch, Rihanna was the one with visible destruction to her body. Now watching Chris on Larry King, his facial expressions that showed lots of attitude at times but also showed embarrassment and guilt for what he had done, I know that his arrogance, something else I saw on his face, played into the level of abuse that Rihanna suffered through.

While I believe Chris is genuinely sorry for the extent of the violence and embarrassed that it happened, I did not see a “cured” Chris Brown. Truth is, before he gets back into a relationship he needs lots of counseling. Chris needs to recognize that he is the “stronger” sex, in most cases, with brute force alone.

He will always be able to beat a woman in physical battle but he should never allow a verbal confrontation with a woman to lead to a physical battle even if that woman puts her hands on him first – just walk away.

Now I know that walking away, sometimes is not that easy because women can become very aggressive when they feel they are not being heard and sometimes it gets to the point where there is no time like the present time to have a discussion. Counseling could help him find alternatives to the violence it could also help him get to the root of the violence.

This is were males need to be able to simply say, “Look, I am not seeing things clearly right now” or “I’m too angry to talk right now can we have this discussion later, after I have thought about it.”

The key to statements like this however is that eventually the conversation needs to take place or else the rage builds inside the female and the next time it will be a little bit harder to walk away using these words.

A “sister” will get up in your face and talk so much trash that sometimes it is hard to get a word in edgewise sometimes you just have to let her rant while you listen just so she can get it out of her system.

Respect is another thing that can push a person over the edge. Yes, Chris is a “grown” man and he may think he can talk to whatever women he wants to talk to whenever he wants to talk to her but expect aggression if you are doing it in front of someone who is suppose to be your “woman.”

In a jealous rage, things happen and when provoked to a jealous rage, arrogance is not the answer, so why even get it started. Respect your “woman” at all times – you can be a dog at another time but never in the presence of your woman. Chris is too young and too cute to be tied down to one woman right now anyway.

While I do not know the details of the confrontation – only Chris and Rihanna really know what truly happened, my experiences in life lead me to these words. I also know inside myself that I have been forever damaged by the domestic violence that I have experienced in my life to the point where I may be the first one to throw a punch if you walk into my space with an attitude and I have an attitude based on treatment that has been handed out by you.

In today’s world, men do not respect women; women do not respect women and young folks are suffering the consequences of this attitude. Domestic violence sometimes is about control but it can also be about a lack of ability to communicate effectively. Whatever the reason for domestic violence, not all men who participate in domestic violence can be put on the same level.

As was the case with my husband, who showed some of the same arrogance I saw in Chris Brown, he was fighting some internal demons that he was never able to conquer. While I tried to get him to open up and truly felt worse for him than I did myself, he never did open up to me. We eventually divorced, he remarried, for the third time, but he never changed and took that violence to the third marriage.

Those demons led him to alcohol, drugs and finally either suicide or an untimely death at the hands of another. The official record says suicide but even to this day, somewhere deep inside, I just can not believe he actually committed suicide – but I was not there so I do not know for sure.

All I do know for sure is that violence is never the answer and if you feel you “need” violence in the relationship for it to work, the reality is you don’t “need” that relationship.

And that’s the way I see it!!!!

Loneliness, frustration, never seeming to quite fit in, fear of losing his job, bullied by his brother when he was young, never feeling loved, the sum total of the existence of George Sodini, the 48-year old man who walked into a L A Fitness gym and opened fire, killing three women and wounding ten others.

Such a sad existence; in a world full of people to have felt so all alone made me feel so sad for this person I did not even know. Although I feel bad for those who lost their life in this selfish act of violence, as well as, those who were injured and those that were traumatized by the experience of the up close and personal violence, somehow reading Sodini’s journal made me feel his pain all the more.

I have always been a believer in the saying that you should always treat people with dignity and respect, if for no other reason than you never know what is clicking in some one else’s head. While some have attributed his actions as being motivated by hate, what I read in his journal and what I felt while reading was a profound, heartfelt loneliness, too painful to bear.

Why he chose to kill innocent people, specifically women, is a mystery to me, unless he felt by doing so he would at least be able to leave this earth in the company of those he desired but was never able to have possession of.

At one point he discusses, in his journal, the expectation that he will be laid off in the next wave of layoffs he expected his company to have; he had worked there for 10 years. He says “That is when there is no point to continue…The paycheck is all I have left.” Yet at the end of July, mere weeks before this tragedy he perpetrated on the innocent people at L A Fitness, he got a promotion instead of the layoff he had expected.

The fact that he maintained a job for ten years and even got a promotion speaks loudly to the possibility that while he was constantly struggling on the inside, his outward appearances seemed “normal” to some degree but with that much going on inside of him, it is hard to believe that he came off as truly normal.

Through his lack of relationships, throughout his life, with women, he never had any children and it seems he never really felt a connection to people at all. Depression and self imposed isolation had affected his thought process, which lead to this bizarre attack that took the lives of innocent people.

Living in America we have seen this time and time again of late where people have taken up their weapons and taken innocent lives in one final act of madness, the final payback, for true or perceived injustices and it is a scary thing to witness either up close and personal of via the news media.

On some levels he blames his family, mother, brother and father for his being the way he is as he momentarily wishes that he could go back to 1975 and fix things before recognizing that they were part of the problem.

Am I to assume that he has been struggling inside himself for 34 years without a soul around him being able to pick up on his internal struggles? Do we, as a people, lack enough empathy to decipher the signs of alienation one feels?

Are these acts of violence preventable? Is there a thread of recognition we can cling to in an effort to see things like this coming? Do we close our eyes to the behaviors that could be viewed as telling, when a person is predisposed to “snap” and commit these heinous crimes? Are we somehow enablers to this type of behavior with our rudeness and judgments?

How many instances of these insane killings will take place before we recognize the potential in those in our lives who would become like Sodini; those who will ultimately leave us indelibly scared by the violence that festers and grows into the homicidal monster that walks, unnoticed, amongst us waiting until the time is right to perpetrate a mass killing like the ones we have witnessed, all to often, over the years?

And that’s the way I see it!!!

Deepest Condolences Funeral Spray

An old saying regarding love goes like this: “If you love something set it free, if it comes back to you it’s yours, if it doesn’t it wasn’t meant to be.” While there is wisdom in those words sometimes the difficulty involved weighs your heart down. This story demonstrates the power of those words and I thought I would share this story with you.

I read an article this morning that kind of touched by heart. After sixteen years, two people where reunited in a love that lasted through time. As a foreign exchange student in southwest England, Carmen Ruiz-Perez met and fell in love with Steven Smith. After a year-long relationship, they became engaged.

Life happened and Carmen ended up moving to France and the relationship ended. Steve never forgot the love they shared though and a few years later he attempted to contact her by mail through her mother’s address in Spain. Carmen was not at home at the time and her mother placed the letter on the mantle and apparently forgot about it.

Time passed, the letter slipped behind the fireplace and life went on. Eventually, builders who were removing the fireplace located the missing letter over a decade later and it was put into the hands of Carmen.

Steve had reached out to her all those years ago and she had missed the call, or so she must have thought after reading the letter. She wanted to call him right away, but she felt too nervous. Curiosity I image made her know deep down that she would make that call soon; and she did.

They scheduled a meeting, Steve and Carmen, and Steve describes the meeting in terms of, it was as if time had stood still. Running across the airport and landing in each other’s arms, looking into each other’s eyes and kissing as though sixteen years had not passed by. They are now a married couple living the life they had planned, all those years ago.

Love makes you weak in the knees, gives you palpitations of the heart and makes life so much more worth living. True love never dies or so they say; true love, a connection of two souls combining into one spirit; pretty heady stuff. Some people go through life without one true love while others seem to find “many,” – is this a case of “love the one you’re with?” This story seems to imply that if it was meant to be time takes care of it and it will be. Still in some cultures marriage is arranged and love comes later.

Whatever the case for you, once you find love, cherish it and through the good and the bad remember love and the capacity to love, on any level, is a gift; be aware also before you “chase” that love away that another saying goes “you never miss a good thing until it’s gone!”

And that’s the way I see it!!!

Embroidered Jersey Dress

In a prepared statement issued through her attorney, 50-year old Lori Drew, the mother accused of cyber-bullying a 13-year old girl who ended up hanging herself states that the decision of Judge George H. Wu, to overturn the verdict which could have sent her to jail for up to three years, “proper”.

Was it “proper for a 50-year old woman to humiliate a 13-year old by setting up a fake account on MySpace in the name of “Josh”? Was it proper to lead this little girl on, making her believe that “Josh” was beginning to like her; paying her compliments only to crush her in the end by telling her “the world would be a better place without you.”

In denial, Drew explains “In my view, it was proper that this case was dismissed, primarily because I simply did not do what the U.S. Attorney in Los Angeles accused me of doing.” Authorities in Missouri originally declined to charge Drew in connection with the death of 13-year old Megan Meier however, prosecutors in Los Angeles, where MySpace is based, decided to charge Drew using the Computer Fraud and Abuse Act.

While this was the first case of its kind brought to trial under federal law and while the jury in Los Angeles found Lori Drew guilty of three misdemeanor charges including accessing computers without authorization, Judge Wu decided on acquittal and to overturn the conviction stating that “if Drew is to be found guilty of illegally accessing computers, anyone who has ever violated the social networking site’s terms of service would be guilty of a misdemeanor.”

Judge Wu goes on to say: “That would be unconstitutional; it could mean that even those who lie about their age on networking sites would be guilty of a crime. Because of the wide range of infractions this guilty verdict would encompass, Judge Wu decided it would be in the best interest of the masses and in the best interest in avoidance of frivolous legal battles for any small infraction that many people are engaging in at the present time.

Meanwhile, Tina Meier, mother of 13-year old Megan told Matt Lauer of the Today Show, that she had hoped Drew would go to prison but says “I wouldn’t want to be in Lori Drew’s shoes and live her life. I think she’s already basically living a life conviction right now.” Since the death of her 13-year old daughter took place in 2006, the time limit may be up for her to file a civil case against Drew.

Drew further states in her prepared statement: “I hope Judge Wu’s decision today will be a turning point for all families involved in returning to a more normal life.” How could she even form those precise words? How will Tina’s life ever return to “normal” after what she witnessed? How will Tina ever purge the memory of finding her daughter hanging in the closet because of the things said to her by Lori Drew? How insensitive were those words coming from Drew?

As I heard the words that Lori Drew said, I felt a level of arrogance, callousness and insensitivity that makes me wonder if she really feels she did no wrong. The mind has a funny way of dealing sometimes, through denial, but my hope is that the reality sets in and haunts Lori Drew for the remainder of her life.

I’m left shaking my head and wondering what was going through this 50-year old woman’s head when she got involved on this level of manipulation laced with malicious desire to wound a 13-year old girl in the manner that she did. R.I.P. Megan though there was no justice gained in the loss of your innocence; the loss of your life.

And that’s the way I see it!!!

Bountiful Blooms

The recent upholding of Proposition 8 here in California was some how disturbing to me. This on the heels of an 18 year, gay, serviceman who was discharged from the service after spending 18 years of his life serving his country, because he came “out” about being gay. How does that make sense? I am reminded of the conversation can you cure homosexuals with religious intervention?

The question, if homosexuals can be cured by religious intervention, is a very curious question indeed. Cured according to Encarta Dictionary means to heal, to restore to health by therapy or medicine. In asking this question of curing homosexuality through religious intervention it implies there is something unhealthy about being gay. Is this really the case?

According to Ted Haggard, New Life Church, who was scandalized and removed from his duties at this church, for homosexual, sex abuse allegations and meth use and who preached against the homosexual lifestyle, he still has, on occasion, thoughts of men, however now he insist these thoughts are not compelling enough to lead him to seek out this life style anymore.

However, when the story first broke, he lied to cover up his behavior. Haggard, even now speaks openly about the love hate struggle, with his homosexual being, he has had over the years, but because of his religion he chooses to live his life as a heterosexual, at this point. Is he truly “cured” or is he just fighting the feeling with his religious justifications?

All homosexuals can not be put comfortably into one category.

1. There are those who are born in the wrong body; by this I mean that their outside body and inside body do not match. They may appear, on the outside, to be one gender, but on the inside, where identity is formed, they may truly think and feel like the opposite sex.

2. There are those people who are bi-curious. They have been heterosexual their whole life, but inside they have always wondered about what it would be like to have a lover of the same sex and, indeed, been attracted to both sexes.

3. There are those people who have been emotionally damaged by the opposite sex, found or placed themselves in situations with the same sex and discovered that this lifestyle was more gratifying for them than the heterosexual encounters they have had, in their search for love and fulfillment.

Religious Reference To Abominations In Life: Old Testaments

The Bible, Old Testaments, states specifically in Levitious 18:22 and 26, “Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is an abomination.” “Ye shall therefore keep my statutes and my judgments.”

Levitious 20:13, “If a man also lies with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; and their blood shall be upon them.” Yet, there are other abominations that we are all guilty of, to some degree or another, and neither this verse nor any other verse in the Bible, directly addresses women lying with womankind.

These other abominations range from lying lips (Proverbs 12:12), the way of the wicked (Proverbs 15:9), everyone who is proud in heart (Proverbs 16:5), the unrighteous (Deuteronomy 25:16) , a husband who has sent away his wife then accepts her back (Deuteronomy 24:4), he that justifieth the wicked, and he that condemneth the just (Proverbs 17:15).

Even some of the things we choose to eat such as “whatever divides a hoof, thus making split hoof, and chews the cud,” are among the animals, that you may not eat, such as the camel, the rabbit and the pig, mankind is guilty of eating some of these things. Also, “whatever is in the water that has no fins and scales among all the teeming life of the water and all the living creatures that are in the water”, we are supposed to be prohibited from eating. (There was a story where God spoke to a man sitting on a roof that I could not find that changes this and states something about blessing the food makes it clean).

These abominations written about in the Bible do not stop here, but include many other abominations as well, to include, “women shall not wear that which pertaineth unto a man” (does this include pants, boxer shorts and by simply saying these garments are specifically made for women, does this erase the fact that they were, originally, the clothing of men), “neither shall a man put on a woman’s garment: for all that do so are abomination unto the LORD thy God.” (Deuteronomy 22:5), Invariably, The list goes on and on, to those who “oppress the poor and needy, hath spoiled by violence, has lifted up his eyes to idols, has given forth upon usury, and hath taken increase, has been unrighteous, to bringing into my sanctuary strangers, uncircumcised in heart, and uncircumcised in flesh, abominations”; none of these abominations have been brought to the table in discussions regarding the “sin” of homosexuality, for we would all be guilty of some type of abomination - Judge not least ye be judged.

So again does homosexuality automatically imply that you are in some way mentally or medically sick and able to be cured by religion?

Jesus And The New Covenant: New Testaments

Based on the list of abominations mentioned in the Bible, we are all guilty of an abomination on one level or another, according to the Old Testaments. However, Jesus brought a new understanding to the table when he walked the earth, an understanding you can judge for yourself by reading, thoroughly, the New Testaments and paying close attention to the parables he uses in an effort to get people to see things in a different light.

Jesus also brought to light a new meaning to judgment, forgiveness and clarity on just who will be welcome into Heaven and in most cases it was not, he who had high expectations because they felt pure within themselves.

Matthew 7:1 and 2 states, “Judge not, that ye be not judged. For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.” Luke 6:37 states, “Judge not, and ye shall not be judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be forgiven.”

John 7:24 states, “Judge not according to the appearance, but judge righteous judgment.” Romans 14:13 speaks of judgment by saying, “Let us not therefore judge one another any more: but judge this rather, that no man put a stumbling block or an occasion to fall, in his brother’s way.” Corinthians 4:5 states, “Therefore judge nothing before the time, until the Lord come, who both will bring to light the hidden things of darkness, and will make manifest the counsels of the hearts: and then shall every man have praise of God.

As you sit tight in your righteous beliefs, you feel you have, in passing judgment on homosexuals, be aware that only God has the true power of judgment because only God knows the heart of man. Choices are given to all, so too does judgment come to all.

Before you step out there passing judgment on a homosexual lifestyle, know that with the same intensity you judge, you will be judged and saying homosexuality is a sickness, is a judgment. The question you should be asking yourself is, how pure is my heart and my deeds in passing this judgment for God is the only true Judge.

And that’s the way I see it!!!

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